When I was younger, I used to wonder why I was born.

The more I thought about it, the more depressed I felt because I realised that there was really no meaning in being alive. I didn't have the power to fight for what I want. I couldn't protect those I love. I couldn't do anything for the Earth. I felt helpless as I watched humans spiral towards choas.

During that period of time, I lost my will to live, but I didn't tell anyone. There was no point because I knew that no one could answer the question as to why we were born. At times, I even felt that we were puppets in a play. We were puppets made to fight against each other, for the pleasure of some other existence that watched with a smirk.

How hollow I thought. Life is so hollow. Sometimes, I even felt as though this body didn't belong to me. But as I grew older, I finally found an aim in life.

I want to pursue happiness.

It sounds like a very simple aim, but it's harder then it seems.

Fallen angel, won't you cry for me?

AHH! I JUST SAW THE CUTEST THING EVER!

Go to this link! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FOV18WKNtgI&feature=player_embedded

Ok, I'm usually not like this, but this is just TOO CUTE!

"You're not an adult yet so we can force you to go Australia."

Do you know how I felt when I heard this sentence? I always believed that the both of you respected my freedom but maybe I was being too idealistic. I almost felt like crying when I heard this sentence.

If only I was a working adult, then I would be able to choose where to live at the very least. I wouldn't be at the mercy of those I depend on.

Do you think that I'm a bad kid? Do you think that I'm being ungrateful to them? All I want is just the freedom to choose my path. I'm not trying to be rebellious, it's just that I can never be a obedient kid.

Like paper airplanes, my dreams glided momentarily,
before spiralling towards oblivion.

I'm tired of fighting.
I'm tired of living in a world I don't believe in.
I'm tired of diplomacy based on cowardice.
I'm tired of oppression from the power holders.

I'm tired of hoping for salvation.

Step in and stifle your screams,
cause this is the ride of life.

I burn because of you.
Like an incinerator, you set my body ablaze.
And it hurts so badly, but I can't stop loving you.
Yet you're a murderer a thief and a cheat.

Everyday, you kill me with this sweet addiction.
And with no remorse, you stole my heart,
Telling me to beat only for you.

Just like a spell, you plant a sweet lie in my ear,
Saying that you love me, oh so disenchantingly surreal.

So when will my love for you eventually turn into ashes?

We are like matchsticks,
weak yet able to pass on hope.

Sara Bareilles, "Gravity":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_U6iSAn_fY&feature=related

My heart feels heavy. I'm tired of trudging on and questioning.

I recieved my Chemistry and Econs paper today. It was awful. Getting back my results reminds me once again the price of happiness.

For every piece of happiness that you receive, there is someone else weeping.
Each glory that you gain exacerbates the wounds of the fallen.
Don't forget that.

Anyway, there's this idotic guy in my class that deserves to beaten up. A_ _hole.

Motionless moving.

On Thursday, I received some shocking news.

And I keep thinking about it :/

Maybe it was a joke?

This is just so unbelievable.